The Saga of Sir Clean-a-Lot and His Vacant Mop
Tonight’s drama? A legendary showdown on John Street, Bedford—where the term “family trouble” gets redefined as Mom vs. Mop: Dawn of Dust Bunnies.
Starring: one overworked, underappreciated college student, clearly too burdened by academia to lift a finger unless it’s tapping a gaming controller. His crime? Refusing to surrender to the tyrannical reign of The Chore List.
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Enter Mom, the fearless enforcer of dishes, dusting, and dignity. After a heated debate over who left the crusty pot in the sink (spoiler: no one ever knows), she makes the ultimate power move—calls the cops and leaves the house. That’s right. Leaves. As in, “You deal with him, I’m done” energy.
Cue the Bedford Police, summoned to this grave domestic crisis. Weapons? None. Threats? Only to the concept of adulting. The son stays behind with Grandma (bless her patience), and the officers wisely pass the resolution back to the family like, “You got this, right?”
And so, the dust settles. The vacuum rests. And somewhere in the distance, a dishwasher remains empty… or full… depending on who you ask.
Another thrilling entry from the ever-tragicomic Bedford Police Blotter. Stay tuned for the next epic: “Sock on the Floor: A Household Divided.”
Because truly, you can’t make this sh*t up.
Pulled from the ever-trusty Bedford Police Blotter. I couldn’t make this up if I tried.
Written By:
William Thomas
This isn’t rage—it’s truth with the volume turned up.
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