Bill’s Soapbox

My Coffee and Muffin Now Come With a Tip Decision

I went through the Dunkin drive-thru for coffee and a muffin. Before I could get my food, I had to answer a question I never expected from the card reader.

Congratulations, You Beat Me to the Red Light

Somebody rode my bumper, blew past me with a gesture, and then met me at the next traffic light. That’s a lot of effort to get nowhere first.

I Bought Spaghetti Ingredients and Somehow Got a Dinner Interview

All I wanted was to buy dinner and leave. The self-checkouts were closed, and the regular checkout came with a question I was hoping to skip.

I Ordered a Sandwich, Not a Search of My Car

A Dunkin drive-thru stop got weird when an old white bag on my front seat became part of the order. It was 6:30 in the morning. I was not prepared to defend my luggage.

The Printer Is Here. The Computer Has Filed a Missing-Person Report.

The printer is plugged in, lit up, and close enough to touch. The computer says it’s offline. Somebody should tell the printer.

The Produce Bag Has an Opening. Good Luck Finding It.

Getting an apple into a grocery store produce bag shouldn’t require this much finger work.

The Power Strip Has Six Outlets. The Plugs Disagree.

A power strip looks spacious until one chunky adapter moves in and blocks the neighbors. Now plugging in a lamp requires a seating plan.

Ordering Extraordinary: Why Do They Even Bother?

A Love Letter to House Insurance

Giant Eagle, A Greeting, and One Hell of a Plot Twist